留学生在完成essay写作时怎么增强连贯性？

      有些留学生在完成essay写作时经常能想到好多论点，但是总感觉这些论点只是机械的罗列，彼此之间都是独立的，并没有组成一个完整的段落。今天Australiaway小编就为大家分享几个小方法，让整个段落看起来是一个整体，而不是一盘散沙。

essay写作连贯性

      今天主要分享的是内容连贯性的问题。下面是老师的打分标准：

      高阶：logically organises information and ideas; there is clear progression throughout

      中阶：presents information with some organisation but there may be a lack of overall progression

      举个例子：

      闲暇时间，年轻人是否应该多在家跟家人在一起，还是出去“浪”？

      错误示范：

      The young who spend more time at home could certainly strengthen the family relationship. It is likely that older family members can give them useful suggestions in their study and career development. The parents are more experienced in life. When the young stay with the family members, they will feel protected and will not feel lonely.

      正确示范：

      The young spending more time at home could bring numerous benefits, and the most obvious one is that the family relationship is certainly strengthened. It is doubtless that the longer the time people spend together, the more intimate they will become. Besides, older family members, who are more experienced in life, can give young people useful suggestions on their study and career development, such as how to cope with pressure from the employer and how to arrange time properly when task is too challenging.

      上面的错误示范中，成为散沙的主要原因有：

      1. 想写的东西太多

      2. 论点之间没有联系

      3. 句子之间无连接词

      增加连贯性的方法

      1. 适当减一些论点

      2. 论证内容丰富一些

      3. 句子之间多使用连接词

      1. 减少论点数量

      同学们在写很多论点的时候，写到后面经常会跑偏。毕竟那些话题里最切题的论点就那几个。同学们后面列举的看似相关的内容，有时候真的不太需要。

      所以，同学们可以放弃多余的论点，围绕几个关键论点，用不同的角度或者论证方式充分去展开。效果一定比之前要好的多。

      示范：科学研究消耗太多时间和金钱？

      原始版本：

      Conducting scientific researches is in many cases not cost-efficient. This is mainly because most experiments require sophisticated technology and equipment. Also, the success rate is normally quite low, which means scientists need to repeat the same process several times. In addition, most findings cannot be discovered or put into practice in the short term. Finally, it is possible that with a large amount of investment, no result is found after years of experimentation.

      上面有4个论点，虽然都比较合理，但是太多反而显得很乱。我们可以试试缩减到一个点，并围绕这一个点去充分展开，大家看看效果如何：

      改进版本：

      Conducting scientific researches is in many cases not cost-efficient, not least because most experiments require sophisticated technology and equipment. For example, in space research, reliable facilities on the ground to send and receive signals accurately from the universe are needed, which could cost millions of dollars, and launching arocket for a one-way trip could even amount to more than one billion dollars. Nevertheless, seldom have we seen any direct application of the discovery of the space exploration at the moment.

      记住，写议论文，展现论证能力，比想到很丰富的细碎的小点更加重要。

      2. 丰富论证内容

      常见的论证方法有：解释原因、推导结果、举例子和做对比。

      如果你列举的论点像“散沙”，那大家就可以在论据前后加上对应的扩展素材，从而让段落显得连贯。

      示范：学校取消书本教学？

      原始版本：

      It is argued that schools no longer need to use textbooks, because this is the trend that no one can avoid. The traditional teaching method using printed books will finally become extinct and students will enjoy using the new and digitalized teaching methods and materials.

      这段说的是书本一定会被电子书取代，因为电子书备受欢迎。但是并不连贯。因为读者不知道为什么传统方式会被淘汰，以及学生为什么喜欢，怎么喜欢新的教学方法。

      改进版本：

      It is argued that schools no longer need to use textbooks. This is evidenced by the fact that many multimedia devices have already been widely used in most educational institutions. For example, by using PPTs and videos, teachers can demonstrate the knowledge in a more engaging and interactive way. Similarly, students equipped with computers or tablets can review lessons easily and accomplish coursework conveniently. Comparatively, traditional teaching methods relying on textbooks can hardly illustrate the information comprehensively with only words and static pictures, making students loss their attention and interests very soon.

      改进的版本中增加了具体的例子：因为电子书和材料以及推广了，并且也为大众所接受，以及会给老师带来的优势，后面还讲了纸质书的缺陷。和原始的版本不同，改进版不仅仅是把一个结论摆在那里，而增加了充分的解释和论据。内容上是不是更有逻辑和连贯性了？我们Australiaway在接到essay代写的单子时也会按照这些方面帮同学们把作业完成好。

      3. 使用连词、代词

      增加连词和代词也是提升句子之间连贯性的好方法。

      连词可以让句子更加连贯。我们很多时候，在完成essay写作时感觉已经做到了足够的连贯性，但是很多人都忘了加一个连词，让老师更好的理解我们的逻辑。

      代词更是如此。前后如果意思紧密相关，通过一个简单的 that/ this/ it，不仅避免了词汇表达的重复，更是提醒老师，essay前后都是在说一件事情。

      示范：小组活动比个人的活动能带来更多能力的提高？

      原始版本：

      Group activities can improve the cooperation skills of the participants. In group activities we can develop the ability to collaborate with others to accomplish one task. We no longer finish assignment simply according to our own wills. In group activities, we will make use of the strength of each group member to maximize the profits. When playing basketball as a group, some may be responsible for passing the ball and implementing the tactic, while others shoot to score. If one practices basketball alone, he will never know the importance of teamwork.

      改进版本：

      Group activities can improve the cooperation skills of the participants, since we can develop the ability to collaborate with others to accomplish one task. This means that we no longer finish assignment simply according to our own wills; instead, we will make use of the strength of each group member to maximize the profits. For example, when playing basketball, some may be responsible for passing the ball and implementing the tactic, while others shoot to score. In comparison, if one practices basketball alone, he will never know the importance of teamwork.

      改进版本中增加了每句话的连词，以及去掉了重复的 in group activities，整体连贯度大幅提高。

      想要增加段落连贯性，同学们可以尝试：减少论点数量；丰富论证内容；使用连词和代词。这就是我们这篇文章的主题。同学们以后在完成essay写作时就可以把这些tips用到文章里。对于essay写作还有各种疑问的同学可以扫描右边的二维码联系我们的客服哦！